Are you looking for posing ideas for LGBTQ couples, or prompts for queer wedding photography? I got you. I’m a queer photographer who works with a ton of LGBTQ couples, and I’m here to give you the inside scoop.

An LGBTQ couple is standing facing each other in the woods in Minnesota. They are wearing coats, scarves, and mittens and smiling at each other.

Posing LGBTQ couples is not “exactly the same” as posing any other couple.

Sure, it can be the same IF you don’t rely on gendered poses to begin with. But so, so many go-to couples poses traditionally have a man in one role and a woman in the other. Like, “have him wrap his arms around her from behind.” Or “have him twirl or dip her while dancing.” You get the point. The whole wedding industry is built around heteronormativity, so I’m here to give you a few more posing ideas for LGBTQ couples to keep in your back pocket for your next queer photoshoot. Read on, aspiring LGBTQ-friendly photographer!

Tip #1: Use prompts instead of poses.

I’ve found prompts-based poses feel a lot more natural for queer couples because they don’t push any sort of gender roles! Some of my go-tos include “whisper something you love about your partner” and “use your best British accent to tell your partner what you want for dinner.”

A wlw couple holds each other close in a hallway. They look into each other's eyes while smiling.

Tip #2: Use movement prompts.

Kind of along the same lines, there are a lot of non-gendered movement prompts you can use! Of course there’s the classic “walk toward me and bump hips,” but my all time favorite is “one of you run in front of the other and yank them forward until they’re in front of you.” I’m also a sucker for a simple “play tag.”

Two women hold hands and run down the beach at Bde Maka Ska in Minneapolis MN. They are laughing.

Tip #3: Ask who should be in which position in classic couples poses.

If there is a pose you like that is traditionally gendered, ask your couple who should fill which role in the couples pose. You can do that by saying something like “who feels more natural to…?” or “if I weren’t here, and you were dancing, would either of you twirl?”

Definitely avoid trains of thought like "OK David is more masculine presenting so I'll have him twirl Sam." Same with piggybacks, hold-from-behind poses, etc.

Two women embrace under an archway. The taller woman holds the other from behind. There are plants in the foreground.

Tip #4: Take the time to learn about the LGBTQ couple you’re working with to truly understand their unique relationship dynamic.

I’ve seen a lot of bad advice on the internet. Some of that bad advice includes to “guess who’s the man in the relationship” (blech) and “just do each pose twice.” When someone suggests that, what I hear is “I’m not committed enough to learning about my clients’ queer relationship dynamic so that I can capture it in an authentic and affirming way.” Eeeeek.

Tip #5: Keep in mind that every LGBTQ person experiences queerness differently.

I'm a strong believer that we shouldn't be assuming relationship dynamics even in straight relationships, but it's super important in queer ones. Gender expression is really important for some queer folks, but not at all for others. Just because someone is more “masc” or “femme” doesn’t mean they fulfill a certain role in the relationship dynamic. For example, my partner is more masc/androgynous than I am, but it would feel natural to twirl each other. If anything they would be the one to jump on my back vs the other way around. Every couple is different and you should be committed to honoring that.

An LGBTQ biracial couple sits on a rock and stares into each other's eyes while smiling.

Tip #6: Do an LGBTQ model call or sign up for an inclusive styled shoot.

If you've never photographed an LGBTQ couple before, I STRONGLY suggest doing a model call and taking some photos for free to get some practice before charging people money. Posing LGBTQ couples isn’t hard, but you don’t want to fumble and end up making your queer clients feel hurt or upset.

In the near future, I will be working with other queer photographers to host a series of LGBTQ styled shoots and workshops in Minnesota. This would be a great opportunity to get practice posing LGBTQ couples, learn how to be a more inclusive photographer, and get some LGBTQ portfolio content.

If you wanna stay in the loop about my LGBTQ couples posing guide (release date TBD), new blog posts in this series teaching photographers how to be more inclusive, and upcoming LGBTQ photography events, you can sign up for my email list here:

Thanks for reading!

xoxo,

Abi

(she/her)

LGBTQ Posing Ideas: How to Pose LGBTQ Couples (by a Queer Photographer!)